“In the future, everyone will freeze their sperm. “If all it takes is for you to masturbate one time to preserve the ability to have kids, why isn’t everyone doing this?” Kteily recalls thinking. In a more meaningful sense, he would be educating clueless Isaacs and lifting the burden from blameless Rebekahs. On one level, he would be competing in the embarrassing penis-stuff arena. If the sperm looked good, he could charge customers to ice a sample in cryostorage. Kteily thinks, What if men could order a thoughtfully branded sperm-test kit to their home, sparing them the discomfort of interfacing with the medical system? If the sperm looked bad, he could sell advice and supplements for improving it. It’s 2017 now, and the men’s-health unicorns Hims and Roman (now Ro) debut, creating a lucrative, direct-to-consumer pipeline for erectile-dysfunction pills. And I became really fixated on just how far apart these two feelings were.” ![]() “But the experience I had was, you know, jerking off in the back of an alleyway. “This is one of the most profound things that I’ve ever done,” he says. Kteily makes an appointment to test and freeze his semen at a lab in Cambridge, where the act of watching the clinic’s pornos and depositing his sample feels like a degrading counterpoint to the eventual pursuit of starting a family. “Imagine I meet someone and have to be like, ‘By the way, you should know: My balls burned off in a freak tea accident, and I can never give you children.’” “Imagine I couldn’t be the husband or father that I want to be,” Kteily says. A friend is undergoing chemotherapy and freezes his sperm as a precaution, and it gets Kteily fretting about his own fertility. A few months later, now enrolled at Harvard’s Kennedy School of Government, his injuries have healed - superficially, at least. When he finally gets to a medical clinic, there’s no burn unit. It’s 2014, and he’s on a work trip in Oklahoma. Six thousand years later, a 25-year-old management consultant named Khaled Kteily spills a tray of scalding Starbucks teas on his lap. Plus stress has been shown to degrade semen quality, and Isaac had had the whole mountaintop brush with filicide. Studies show that advanced paternal age is associated with increased risk of miscarriage and that men contribute to at least a third, and maybe closer to half, of global cases of infertility. ![]() They didn’t wed until he was 40 their children weren’t born until Isaac was threescore years old. Rebekah appears to have been significantly younger than Isaac. “And the Lord was intreated of him, and Rebekah his wife conceived.”īut was she barren? Lately, I’ve been wondering. ![]() “Isaac intreatied the Lord for his wife, because she was barren,” reads the King James Bible. He and his wife, Rebekah, struggled to have children. Some time after his father, Abraham, strapped him to an altar and attempted to sacrifice him to God, Isaac suffered another misfortune.
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